Anger

Anger

“Anger turns off the light in the mind.”  Indeed, it does.  Anger is one of the most seductive and deceiving emotions.  The initial rush of adrenaline always feels empowering but it is actually poisonous.  Angers leads inevitably to mistakes.  We regret decisions made in anger.  We say things that we wish to retract.  Rather than being the best tool to fix a problem, anger is the sledgehammer of destruction; when unnecessarily angry, one would use it to kill a gnat.  Essentially, the mental darkness that anger produces clouds our decision-making. 

In many instances, anger cloaks deep-seated fears.  The melodrama of rage fools us into believing that we are in control.  We try to intimidate people into yielding to our selfish demands.  We also manipulate our circumstances to prevent losing something that we have.  Fears of unfulfilled desires and loss of property or status belie the eruption of angry emotions.  Instead of the fallacious demonstration of “righteous indignation,” acknowledging our fears and working through them better serve us.

Anger prevents clear communication.  When people yell at each other, they are not communicating.  An explosive dialogue is nothing other than an exchange of volatile emotions.  Ultimately, such a conversation is useless.  People say things that they later regret but cannot erase.  After a cooling off period, all parties can join the conversation with a principled position borne out of lucid reflection and spiritual meditation.  The brilliance of calm analysis surpasses the bleakness of deceitful anger.

It is helpful to learn how to process anger.  Because of its untrustworthy nature, it benefits us if we practice the discipline of filtering it.  I suggest remaining quiet and reflective for at least a cycle of twenty-four hours.  If after a day, you are still angry, then perhaps your emotions are legitimate.  Having utilized this technique, I find that my frustrations, number of apologies and regrets decrease significantly.

Many relationships are torn apart because of anger.  In fact, all us of know people who insist upon nursing grudges against siblings, extended relatives and former coworkers.  When asked what precipitated the crisis and resentment, they do not recall.  But, they remain angry.  Ironically, this anger harms them more than it does the objects of their ire.  Whereas it is necessary to sit on our anger, it is also wise to resolve it permanently.  We relate better to our spouses, children, and friends when we are not angry.   

Retaining useless anger within the mind and heart causes a cancer of the personality.  Captain Ahab in Herman Melville’s Moby Dick symbolizes the fallacy of harboring anger.  In time, his resentment matures into revenge.  He desires to take the life of the great whale that had bitten off his leg.  Ahab’s thirst for vengeance, undergirded by his anger, led to the loss of his life in the final struggle between the whale, the ocean, the natural elements and himself.  Ahab’s anger broke his spirit and blinded him from seeing everything else that life offers him.

You are probably wondering about the legitimacy of righteous indignation.  Are there not times in which anger is justified?  Most assuredly, situations arise in which anger is the most appropriate response.  I submit that fury toward economic, social and political injustice is reasonable and healthy.  In fact, I hate oppression of poor and subjugation of working people regardless of where it occurs.  However, those strong emotions are best directed toward socio-economic and socio-political structures rather than people. 

In the final analysis, it benefits us to channel our anger toward constructive purposes.  As a replacement for the fuel of melodrama, allow your anger to inspire you to work harder toward your goals.  Avoid lingering in the mire of resentment and bitterness.  Direct that energy toward a helpful resolution.  Yet, should we insist upon being angry, then we remain in the pit of night.  “Anger turns off the light of the mind.”