"To Thine Own Self Be True"

“To Thine Own Self Be True”

In one of the final interviews he gave before retiring the late Justice William J. Brennan, responding to a question about whether he regretted any decisions, votes and opinions during his tenure on the U S Supreme Court said, “No. I have no regrets.  I called it the way I saw at the time.”  As I listened to this valedictory and reflective interview of that brilliant judge, I realized just how worthless regret actually is.  It cannot change anything.  It may actually imprison you to the past.  Maximizing each day’s opportunities for self-acceptance and self-expression are the most effective antidotes to regret.  

Do you know any people who could have been great?  Quite possibly, they deeply regret their failure to utilize “an opportunity of a lifetime.”  Conceivably, fear paralyzes them and they never see the options that they have.  Maybe, they feel stuck like a first generation immigrant factory worker who had to remain on that job to provide for his family though his interests and talents exceeded his circumstances.  For the person with talents who fails to actualize them, a rocking chair in which to nurse his lifelong regrets awaits him. 

However, he can avoid taking that dead end road.  Judy and Katie Griffler posit a lengthier version of Shakespeare’s enduring adage, “To Thine Own Self Be True,” as the practical and pragmatic means of traversing regret.  I am not telling you how you should live, but how you should feel when you look back at the memories of a once-upon life of yours.  Don’t regret things later.  If you feel it is right, do it.  It’s your life and nobody else’s.  Make decisions that please you.  Let nobody put you down.  Don’t live in anybody’s shadows or dreams.  If you do have a dream, act on it and it will probably come true.  They suggest you find inner courage and peace of mind as you live the unique life which your Creator gives you.  Henry David Thoreau recommends, “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.  Live the life you imagine.” 

You have the right to be happy in life.  As a unique child of God, you do not have to defend, justify, explain, legitimize or otherwise apologize for your choices.  If you sacrifice your individuality on the altar of social conformity assuredly you will live with deep-seated and worthless regrets.  You may even become an embittered, jealous, and cynical person who no longer dreams or believes life has any mysteries, miracles and joys.  Simply, you become a small hearted, simple minded and short sighted person who blames everyone else for your problems.

Forsake regret in any form.  Reflect upon your past life with peace of mind.  Have courage to act upon your hunches, and creativity.  After all, only you can live your life.  Resist the compulsion to seek approval outside of yourself.  Find inner strength to trust “the still, small voice” within you.  Live into your best decisions as fully as you can; then they become the right decisions for you.  As a child of God, you do not grovel for any reason.  Fiercely and reasonably defend yourself in appropriate ways and settings.  Be true to yourself; do not live vicariously through anyone else.  Other people’s shadows always obstruct your view and impede your comprehension.  Daily and faithfully pursue your dreams and goals. 

The Grifflers’ practical advice opens the doorway to new vistas.  Eliminating regret forever cuts the ball and chain of past mistakes and failures.  You can recycle your past regrets into assets for healing.  Applaud yourself for recognizing the worthlessness of regret.  Find ways to utilize your experience to help others.  You open the door of the past for someone with fresh wounds.  Freedom from the past liberates you to embrace present opportunities with confidence.  Unconditional self-acceptance empowers you to progress toward unique self-expression without apology.  Eventually, a day dawns in which you awaken, look in the mirror, accept the person you see and give thanks for another day in your life.  “To Thine Own Self Be True!”